Around one year ago I wrote an article titled Life Advice From A Twenty-Year-Old that gave me reason to reflect on the year and think about what I learned from the people and experiences I encountered in 2014. A lot has changed since I wrote that post, and I have experienced even more over the past year, so I thought I would share some of the valuable lessons that have been recognised and consolidated through this year's happenings.
- Be present: I have come to learn the importance of truly being present and giving your undivided attention to others. To me one of the most important intelligences is social intelligence, and I believe that this year has presented a lot of opportunities to push myself and develop my social skills. It is important to be able to converse with other people, but it is even more important to listen to people and give them your full attention, free of judgement. I do think that having strong opinions and challenging other's views is healthy, but to have the ability to listen to someone and understand why they hold their views and thoughts on things gives you the opportunity to question the world and understand it from a different perspective. Every voice is valuable.
- Live in the now: When I was a teenager, my anxiety was at its worst when I would think too far ahead. I would constantly run through my mind how one decision could impact other things, and it would largely affect my ability to think rationally. This year I have learnt to live completely in the moment; to not stress about what has happened or what will happen. I suppose this is another facet of 'being present' - not only in regards to your relationship with other people, but also your relationship with yourself. I used to always wonder where I would be in five or ten years' time. Now I am completely content with taking each opportunity as it comes and letting things happen, day by day. By thinking too far into the future, you are forgetting about what is happening right now. What you do today will - in some way - mould your future, so be conscious of making the most of today and living in the present.
- Challenge your limits: Feeling comfortable and safe is something I have become so underwhelmed by. This year has presented me with some big challenges, and I have made an effort to try as many new things as possible and accept any challenges or tasks that I would normally turn down. It is very easy to get used to a routine and not want to extend your comfort zone because you know there is little room for failure. I definitely think failure is something that a lot of people are afraid of. And at times I am scared of failure, too. But through trying new things you are learning. And I think that's the beauty of learning - it doesn't matter how knowledgeable you are, there is always so much more out there that you have not yet discovered. Through challenging myself this year, I have identified what I want to focus on in education - I have realised that I want to work specifically with youth with autism and/or trauma in the wellbeing sector. Had I not been exposed to young people with these differences, I think I would have settled for mainstream classroom teaching without realising the different areas I could work in. Give credit to yourself for trying, and look at learning as a reward in any new situation, no matter how good or bad the outcome.
- Look after your body and your mind: I have always been aware of my diet and maintained regular exercise since I was younger, so I considered myself 'healthy' for a long time. However, I have not always had a healthy mindset. Over the past two years I have taken control of my mental health and made it a goal to achieve my most healthy mind possible. Due to this, I have seen massive improvements in my overall health. Despite my healthy diet and exercise, I used to feel very tired and low, and this would impact on my relationships and socialisation more than anything. What I realised, though, was that through talking to other people and gaining new perspectives, I was healing myself. Speaking out and finding people who are willing to listen helped a lot, and I'm probably in the most healthy state I can be in at this current moment. I have a beautiful network of people around me, and I am thankful for the creativity and spirit of the people I am surrounded by in my life right now.
- Be giving: Give without expectation. Don't offer your time or make an effort with someone or something expecting anything in return. Do what you feel is the right thing to do and do what you feel strongly about. I always like to think about the idea that you are attracted to certain people in your life for a reason. When I look at all of my closest friends, I notice one consistent quality in all of them - they are all genuine, giving people; they share their time, their heart and their thoughts with me. The kind of 'giving' that I value the most is not the materialistic kind - it is the giving of yourself; of being a good person, giving your love to others, using your unique qualities to better the world in which you live.
- Celebrate the 'little wins': Perhaps I am a bit of an optimist, but I am always so impressed by the little things people do in their lives. I often think that people who are humble in their work and relationships are not acknowledged as they should be. Sometimes it is nice to hear an 'I'm proud of you' or an 'I appreciate it' when you least expect it, so I make sure to celebrate the little wins with the people around me. It might be something as simple as a kid using their manners, or someone getting through a hard week at work. It is normal for people to get through massive days and just accept what has happened without acknowledging just how much they have done, so I like them knowing that someone has appreciated what they have done for themselves or others. You never know the power that a few words can have on another person's day.
I hope 2015 has been an amazing year that has challenged, surprised and been kind to you. Don't underestimate what you have achieved over the past twelve months, and have hope that the next twelve will present a lot of unexpected opportunities that will help guide your growth and decisions. Here's to next year's adventures.
-Nicole
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